Why do I feel like this?

Why do I feel like going under a rock and never coming out? Thoughts race through my mind non stop. I loose control and want to do things to myself...or others. I cant act on them but they are there. My heart hurts. I long for something but I dont know what it is. I feel like Im crazy like if anyone knew they would hate me. I cant talk to anyone. He wants me to talk to him but I just cant talk about things that inolve me and my feelings. I fear that Im crazy and he will think that too. I mean who wants a crazy girl? God damn it whats wrong with me? I just want to cry, scream, do something stupid. But i cant be crazy..I cant be...i just cant be.